Sexually and intimate relationships

Of course not. The ability to raise a child has little to do with one’s sexual orientation. The idea that one could be “worse off” due to being raised by a lesbian or gay couple is crazy. I think it has much more to do with the environment one is raised in. On the other hand, I can understand people like Mark Regnersus’s approach that children do better in same-sex marriages. However, I think he has a skewed understanding of why. I think it has less to do with parents’ actual sexual orientation and more to do with what society expects of child-parent relationships. Society has taught us that the expected and accepted form of love is between a man and a woman. In Andersen’s book, she mentioned the portrayal in children’s movies and TV shows. Children grow up seeing that love should be heterosexual. They don’t see different or fluid sexuality as something to be embraced, which I think in turn can cause questions, resentment, and lack of understanding, to no fault of their own. Mark argues that same-sex parents (especially female same-sex) get more irritated with their children. I think it is important to note that women typically take on the parental role in most heterosexual relationships. They take on the roles of nurturer and caregiver, and in our society, we could argue they do most of the parental work. (Stereotype but based on what we see). I do think this in some ways affects the stress level of parents and why a female same-sex couple might get more irritated. If you asked a heterosexual couple these same questions, I’m sure we would see a difference in male and female responses. The fear of men in our society and the authority given to the male parent could also play a part in this construct, but I do not think it affects parenting the way Mark is arguing. I think the biggest fear that people have about same-sex parenting is that the child will be raised and coerced into being LGBTQ+. Other concerns include being bullied for their parents’ relationship, whether they will become sexual deviants, whether the children are psychologically harmed, and that they miss the experience of the opposite sex parent. These concerns are just another way to push a homophobic agenda by backing it up with bogus statistics. I think the three most important components of a house are love, stability, and acceptance. I think knowing you live in an environment where you are cared for, provided for, and appreciated is the most important thing. I think sexual orientation has little to do with one’s ability to provide these things. The study conducted in Taking Sides resulted in proving that emotional difficulties, general health, coping behaviors, and learning behaviors are not drastically affected based on the sexual orientation of parents. I think a better question we can now ask is: can we chalk up these moderate differences in stress to gender rather than sexuality? At the end of chapter 4, Andersen discusses the notable difference between male and female intimacy. How does that affect relationships with one’s child or the upbringing of a child? include 1 academic reference.

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